apa tok? pengajaran dari mu tuk diriku?

waahhh...tajuk nak gempaqqq ahahahaha ..

its been awhile i didn't write anything here..

ok, aku masuk fasa baru dalam hidup aku. semua nya masih baru. environment, duties, kawan kawan, semua nya masih baru. dan aku masih dalam adjustment mode. tapi bukan itu yang aku nak luahkan di sini. aku rasa aku tak patut luahkan disini, tapi aku tak tahu nak cerita kepada siapa, jadi aku pilih cerita kepada semua berharap you akan tahu dis one is for you.

bangun bangun tido aku trus baca semua text selama seminggu ni..aku jadi tension. stress. and depressed. aku tak salahkan kau. aku tahu, aku ada salah nya di situ. dan aku tak kata kau salah sebab kau ada betulnya. dan tak semua kau betul, aku rasa kau ada salahnya.

pada mulanya aku rasa aku betul. sumpah. aku betul. aku rasa diri aku betul. then hari ini, setelah aku muhasabah diri. setelah penat mataku mengeluarkan air mata. setelah penat aku memerah otak fikirkan kenapa. aku sedar. rupanya aku banyak salah dari betul.

kau betul. semua yang kau katakan aku berlagak. sombong. bajet pandai. aku rasa kau betul. sebab kau org yang paling hampir dengn aku. kau yang 24 jam bersama aku. sumpah aku tak percaya bila kau tuduh aku macam itu. sebab kawan kawan aku semua kata aku macam biasa. cuma makin menyusahkan mereka ada lah, btol x missgolong? hehe.

selepas aku baca balik semua text selama seminggu tu..baru aku prasan, mana salah dan silap ku. paling aku kecewa ialah aku tak ambik serius pun dalam hal yang kau tengah menegur sebab aku, aku binggung dengan dunia baru ku yang memerlukan banyak benda tuk belajar. aku stress. tapi kau lah tempat aku mengadu. tempat aku bermanja. tempat aku release stress. dan aku tau kau tak suka dilayan sebegitu.

it is my fault. aku mintak maaf dari hujung rambut sampai hujung kaki. aku ambik perkara ini mudah. samapai lah kau mintak space. baru aku tersedar, bahawa perkara sudah teruk lagi bernanah. aku hanya mampu mohon keampunan.. dari kau.. dan aku mengucapkan terima kasih, kerana menyedarkan aku terlebih awal dari biasa.. thank you.

aku manusia biasa. aku buat silap. dulu masa persekolahan, kita di belajar pengajaran tuk menduduki ujian. tapi dalam kehidupan, kita diberi ujian untuk belajar pengajaran. ini pengajaranku. aku harap, aku tidak dihukum dengan kesalahan yang lain.

saya minta maaf wak..

1-1-11

Welcome 2011 :)

changes

i am in boring mode.

i mean, rite now, i'm super duper boring.

i need some changes. new things. new thrill.

i need to feel the rush.

changes is good people.

i need to make a drastic step.

any suggestion?

baru sebulan

baru sepuluh hari berpuasa. alhamdulillah.

baru sebulan dengan loan department. kehangatan kebosanan kehidupan sudah mula terasa.

selamat berpuasa! :D

What Month You Were Born?

JANUARY=PIMP
Loves to chat. Loves those who love them. Loves to takes things at the centre. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn't pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Brave and fearless. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care to control emotions. Unpredictable. Extremely smart, but definitely the hottest AND sexiest of them MFE.

FEBRUARY=THUG
Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. sexiest out of everyone. A real speed demon. Has more than one best friend. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizing dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions.


MARCH=GORGEOUS
Drop dead gorgeous!!! Attractive personality. Very! sexy. Affectionate & Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Chatterbox! Loves to talk a lot! Loves to get their way! . Unbelievable kisser! Easily angered. Very stubborn in the most way possible! Loves to get noticed! Willing to take risks for others. Makes good choices. Has a great fashion sense! Maybe a little too popular with others * wink wink *. Outgoing and crazy at times! Intelligent. Can sometimes be a heartbreaker! Can love as much as
possible! Hates insults. Loves compliments! A very big flirt! Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. The best in bed out of NE of these months!! Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Observant and assesses others, likes to keep they’re crushes kind a secret, pretty much flawless.


APRIL=SEXY
Suave and compromising. Funny and humorous. Stubborn. Very talkative. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal. Does work well with others. Very confident. Sensitive. Positive Attitude. Thinking generous. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Able to cheer everyone up and/or make them laugh. Able to motivate oneself and others. Understanding. Fun to be around. Outgoing. Hyper. Bubbly personality. Secretive. Boy/girl crazy. Loves sports, music, leisure and travelling. Systematic. Hot but has brains.


MAY=LOVER
Hella sexy, loves sex n making luv, tends to be SOOOOO hot!! Active and dynamic. Decisive and haste but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves peoples problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Usually you have many friends. Enjoys to make love. Emotional. Stubborn. Hasty. Good memory. Moving, motivates oneself and others. Loves to travel and explore. Sometimes sexy in a way that only their lover can understand.


JUNE = LUST
Fun to be with. Loves to try new things. Boy/girls LOVE you. You are very hot. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation. Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about people's feelings. Tactful. Friendly. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. snazzy at times. Not revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets. dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. Guides others physically and mentally. Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. Hardworking. No difficulties in studying. Loves to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends. Waits for friends. Never looks for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover.




JULY=GANGSTA
You've got the best personality and are an absolute pleasure to be around. You love to make new friends and be outgoing. You are a great flirt and more than likely have a very attractive partner, a wicked hottie. Like somebody with a JUNE birthday. It is also more likely than that you have a massive record collection. When it comes to films, you know how to pick them and may one day become a famous actor/actress yourself - heck, you've got the looks for it!!!


AUGUST=ATTITUDE
outgoing personality. takes risks. feeds on attention. self control. kind hearted. Self confident. loud and boisterous. VERY revengeful. easy to get along with and talk to. has an "every thing's peachy" attitude. likes talking and singing. loves music. daydreamer. easily distracted. Hates not being trusted. BIG imagination. loves to be loved. hates studying. in need of "that someone". longs for freedom. rebellious when withheld or restricted. lives by "no pain no gain" caring. always a suspect. playful. mysterious. "charming" or "beautiful" to everyone. stubborn. curious. independent. strong willed. a fighter.


SEPTEMBER=FINEASS PIMP
Loves to chat. Loves those who love them. Loves to takes things at the centre. Great in bed. Inner and physical beauty. Doesn't pretend. Gets angry often. A meaningful love life partner. Makes right choices. Treats friends importantly. Brave and fearless. Always making friends. Does not harm others. It is all about love and fairness. Easily hurt and hard to recover. Daydreamer and does fulfill. Opinionated. Does not care to control emotions. Knows what to do, to have fun. Unpredictable. Someone to have close to you. Extremely smart, but definitely the hottest AND sexiest of them all.


OCTOBER=HOTTIE
Trustworthy and loyal. Very passionate and dangerous. Wild at times. Knows how to have fun. Sexy and mysterious. Everyone is drawn towards your inner and outer beauty and independent personality. Playful, but secretive. Very emotional and temperamental sometimes. Meets new people easily and very social in a group. Fearless and independent. Can hold their own. Stands out in a crowd. Essentially very smart. Usually, you ever begin a relationship with someone from this month, hold on to them because their one of a kind.


NOVEMBER=SWEETIE
Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Shy towards opposite sex. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves travelling. Dislike being at home. Restless. having many children. Hardworking. High spirited.


DECEMBER=BEAUTY
This straight-up means you’re the most good-looking Loyal and generous. Patriotic. Competitive in everything. Active in games and interactions. Impatient and hasty. Ambitious. Influential in organizations. Fun to be with. Easy to talk to, though hard to understand. Thinks far with vision, yet complicated to know. Easily influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having lots of ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating, tends to delay. Choosy and always wants the Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Shy towards opposite sex. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves travelling. Dislike being at home. Restless. having many children. Hardworking. High spirited

life changing

dulu, aku bawa slide pergi kelas. sometime bawak buku. sometime x bawa apa apa

sekarang, aku bawa pen pergi office.

dulu, duit pt tuk aku seorang

sekarang, duit gaji, banyak benda yang perlu di bayar

dulu, bapak aku bagi wang saku

sekarang, aku cari wang saku aku sendiri

dulu, aku selalu makan maggie

sekarang, aku makan masakan emak aku.... ye adik ku jeles. hahaha.

dulu, selalu spent time dengan kawan kawan

sekarang, masing masing ada kehidupan masing masing

dulu, aku seorang pelajar

sekarang, aku seorang perkerja

tapi

tapi

bila aku jadi graduan??

life doing mistakes mean everything rather than life doing nothings.

aku pernah berkata sebelum ini kalau kau pakai baju baru tapi kau simpan dengan baju baju lama yang dah berbau hapak, baju baru ka akan bau hapak juga.

sama macam kehidupan kita. jika kawan kawan kau seorang yang positif, kau pun akan positif.

im in pain. yeah. tp aku sedaya upaya untuk tersenyum. tiada siapa yang akan tolong diri kau melainkan kau sendiri.

lidah manusia setajam pisau. boleh membunuh. hanya diri kau boleh survive dengan kat kata setajam pisau atau menangkis nya.

apa yang sudah dilafazkan xkan kembali lagi. sepertimana kau melukakan hati orang lain sama la seperti kau pakukan paku didinding. Bila kau minta maaf, umpama kau cabut paku itu, dan, bekas nya tetap di situ. remain forever.

peluang kedua.peluang ketiga. banyak yang tak berjaya lakukan dengan lebih baik, sebab, mereka tak tahu bagaimana. and so am i.

banyak benda yang bermain di kotak minda aku sekarang. aku meminta pertolongan dari-Nya. Aku berserah segala galanya kepada-Nya. dan aku tak akan berhenti berusaha. tidak sama sekali!

p/s: life doing mistakes mean everything rather than life doing nothings.